Recurring Plane Crash Dreams
I have these recurring dreams of planes crashing. They don’t happen that often, but often enough to disturb me, and cause me to do a quick search on the internet about it.
I am never inside the plane, always on the ground watching. And the plane always tries to pull out of the crash using some strange physics that is only available in dreams, but then ends up plowing into the earth and basically disintegrating. I am never aware of knowing any of the passengers, just that there are passengers.
I always realize that the plane is going to crash before it actually does, and all I do is stand there and watch it (what more could anyone do in that circumstance?). It usually crashes quite close to me, no more than a few hundred feet away. Sometimes it crashes into a building (part of the airport in one dream) and other times into the ground (my next-door-neighbor’s yard in another dream).
In the airport dream, the plane was about to crash down onto me, but somehow put on the “brakes” and slowed to a stop right above my head, then sort of swung like a pendulum for a moment before being shot off to the side, but not at a high enough angle to pull out of the crash. The plane crashed into a building just past the building I was standing near.
In the neighbor’s yard dream, I saw the plane (a HUGE passenger plane, bigger than exists in reality) up in the sky flying normal except for the fact that there was a small cloud hovering around it and staying with it. I thought to myself what a bummer for the pilot to have that cloud following his plane, when all of a sudden, the plane did a barrell roll to try and get out of the cloud. I was thinking about whether or not the passengers were rolling around in the plane, when the plane suddenly made an abrupt u-turn and began flying toward my direction. I think at this point I realized that for the plane to do a barrell roll was not normal and meant the plane was in trouble. The plane then proceeded to dramatically lose altitude as it flew, and crashed into my neighbor’s yard. There was lots of schrapnel after that, and I pulled a blanket over myself for protection, but was never hit by anything anyway.
From what I have read on the internet, I may have anxiety issues about something over which I have no control. Like I didn’t already know that. Being a stay-at-home-mom = two anxiety issues: more difficult finances (over which you haven’t much control because you aren’t working a full-time job), and being a mom (worrying about your kids).
So where does all this lead me? I don’t know. I’m not going to go back to working outside the home, and my kids are (knock on wood) here to stay.
So how do I lower my anxiety?
I don’t have family nearby, and we don’t have daycare or babysitters, so my little ones are almost always with me. I have no practical means of “escaping” motherhood. And I don’t think that being away from them would help my anxiety – in fact, it would probably increase at least twofold. More loss of control.
I know I can’t keep them safe from everything. But I still want to. I still feel responsible. I can’t make that go away.
As for the finances, I’m already doing everything I can to make some side money from home. I have websites, I have accounting clients, and I have web design clients. Not much more I can do there either.
So how do you relieve anxiety??? Give me some suggestions, please!
UPDATE 01-17-11: Wow, everyone! It’s amazing how many people have these dreams and end up trying to figure out what they mean! Oddly enough, after writing this blog a few years ago, I have not had another one of these dreams, thank goodness. I have had a few other stressful anxiety dreams, but none that are recurring. I attribute time to relieving a little of my anxiety over being a mom and dealing with staying at home. My youngest starts kindergarten this fall, and I am currently taking my CSET and CBEST tests so that I can work as an elementary school teacher within the next year and a half, so the stay at home thing will still be true (I’ll be here when my kids aren’t at school) but I will be earning some money which will be such a relief!
Thanks so much to everyone for their comments here, I love reading them all… it’s amazing the things we have in common!
Posted in My World In Pictures